Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Memory performs the impossible for man by the strength of his divine arms; holds together past and present, beholding both, existing in both, abides in the flowing,and gives continuity and dignity to human life. It holds us to our family, to our friends. Hereby a home is possible; hereby only a new fact has value."

This was written by Emerson who spent the last twelve years of his life with Alzheimer's disease. He could form no new memories at all.

At the funeral for Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, he is reported to have said of his friend of fifty years," The gentleman who lies here was a beautiful soul, but I have forgotten his name.

GLEN ELLYN

We found a "secure" place for mom and dad in Illinois-close to where they used to live. It was very nice and they thought they were in a hotel until dad would try to go outside. He pushed against the doors until they opened into the courtyard and there he stood in the snow refusing to come back in. He said he felt as if he were in jail. Once he ran away in the courtyard and the workers had to chase him-then one day he ran up against the 9' fence-

So, he had to be on some medications to help him "adjust" to his new surroundings. Mom was put on some too and she seemed to be content-she was just visiting somewhere and most of the day she would pack and wait to go home-sitting with her gloves on.

She liked the games and the people-she still talks about how much fun she had there.

We all talked about it and decided that mom and dad could come and live with us here in Michigan at our home-we had brought their furniture over after they left Green Acres and it was in our large guest bedroom.

So, they are here and we love them and are trying to help them adjust to not going "home'.

They are off of all the drugs and dad, of course, is his mellow self again-he does not remember being in Glen Ellyn-the fence or the trapped feeling. I'm glad for that.

love dies slowly

I think mom somehow blames dad for what has happened to her and she is mad at him most of the time. "I don't love you anymore" she says- "you should get another wife" she barks- Dad does not understand that she is "sick" and he hurts so badly over this rejection.

"What can I do to make her happy again?" is his all day quest.

She swears a lot and calls him names- it hurts to see them like this as they have always been so in love. He would do anything for her - in his own dementia he cannot understand and there is no comfort we can give to him.

I Want to Die While You Still Love Me

I want to die while you still love me,

While yet you hold me fair,

While laughter lies upon my lips

And lights are in my hair.

I want to die while you still love me,

and bear to that still bed,

Your kisses turbulent, unspent,

To warm me when I'm dead.

I want to die while you still love me,

Oh, who would care to live

Till love has nothing more to ask

And nothing more to give!

I want to die while you still love me,

and never, never see

The glory of this perfect day

Grow dim or cease to be.

Georgia Johnson

stories

While staying at our house as we were locating a new place for mom and dad they enjoyed telling old stories. Dad remembers quite vividly all his time in the navy. He got out a map one day and showed us all the places his ship went during the war and his duties while on it.

At dinner one night we were asking what he didn't like about Green Acres and he said he thought they put "salt peter" in the food like they did when he was at military school and in the navy!!

Mom said, "What is salt peter"? Doug and I tried not to laugh. Finally he told mom it was put in the food so that they wouldn't think about girls!!

REALLY

Must have worked at Green Acres!!!