Shirley and Barbara

I went to visit mom and dad today.

Mom had had a bad weekend as she had wandered into a neighbor lady's room where she was met with anger at the intrusion.

Mom was pushed.

Mom is a real people person and has always had so many friends and not any enemies.

Now in her dementia there is someone who does not like her.

It is confusing to her and she of course does not understand.

Dad is no help other than being there to hold her hand and ask her when they are going to get out "of this place".

Mom does not have many pictures that she keeps up on her bulletin board-but the one of her sister Shirley is still there.

They have the Christmas tree up and dad was remarking about how tall it was. I said, "Well, not like the one at Marshall Field and Co.".

Mom eyes really sparkled as she thought of her "favorite" store.

"No way," she said.

And she did remember the Walnut Room and the mushroom soup!!!

Love you Mom

shopping

Today Doug drove Anna and myself into Traverse City for the Black Friday sales. It was the first time I had ever gone and it was quite an experience. We found a few things that we could use and stood in long lines in order to purchase them. We saw a few friends while out. There was a bit of snow which made it nice.

A very long time ago mother and I and my sister, Nancy, would get on the Burlington train in our suburb of Chicago and ride to Marshall Field's where we would shop all day and eat in the restaurant under the Christmas tree that was many stories high.

It was a wonderland for us. We would ride the escalators up and down. Just looking at all the people was breathtaking. Listening to them talk to each other and the different kinds of clothes they all wore opened up a different world to us.

I can still remember the toy section--we never had many toys at home, after all it was the late 1950's and I had no idea that such a variety existed.

Lunch in the tea room was so fancy. Some years we would go with our cousins and Aunt Shirley, Mom's sister. Those were special times that I will hopefully never forget.

Every year we would make the trip to Marshall Field's. Even after I was married with my own children we would go-now just Mom and myself for a day of shopping and lunch in the tea room.

Mom was always so much fun and loved to go to her favorite store-Marshall Field's.

I worked there myself the year before I was married in 1969. I wasn't there during Christmas so I didn't get to see how the tree was all arranged.

As my own children married Doug and I would sometimes travel to Chicago to go with them to view the windows of Marshall Field's in all their Christmas glory and to walk through the store just to see what might be there.

The store changed and it was never as it had been in those wonderful days of shopping with mom--but even now if I mention Marshall Field's mom will brighten up and remember some of the good times there.

Those were the good old days of shopping--sales ladies wanting to help you--packages nicely wrapped--the bus to catch in the snow and hurrying to get to Union Station in time to make the train home.

What glorious memories, may they never fade.

Thanksgiving

Today was Thanksgiving Day.

Doug, Anna and I had a great meal at Crystal Mountain Resort .

We have always had friends and relatives for Thanksgiving, but this year was different and we learned a good lesson.

It's not the food that matters it is family and fellowship.

However, because of our situation this year we were able to go and spend the afternoon with mom and dad in Ludington.

They were sitting together as usual, well dressed and nicely groomed.

Their faces brightened as they saw us enter and dad quickly stood up, as a gentleman should, to greet us.

He asked how our Thanksgiving had been and occasionally thought today had been Christmas.

But he did know that today was a special day.

I am so glad that we went.

I am thankful for my parents.

I love to see their faces and to laugh with them about nothing.

Today mom wanted to sing:

"Someone's in the kitchen with Dina, someone's in the kitchen I know, ow,ow ow.

Someone's in the kitchen with Dina strumming on the old banjo."

We laughed and sang all that we knew of it.

Dad told me that mom was goofy now and I told him that he had to take care of her and commended him for being so patient. He seemed to accept that.

He then told me to be sure to get the boat out on the buoy securely and to keep the cottage warm enough.

I assured him that I would.

He held my hand all the time we were there.

I love you mom and dad

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Shirley and Barbara - sisters and best friends

Aunt Shirley, mom's older sister, died yesterday.

She was 89 years old.

Mom depended on her big sister for advice and comfort all through their long lives.

Mom will not be able to mourn for her sister.

But she has happy memories still.

She knows her sister when she sees her in a photograph.

We will all miss Shirley Lake.

She had a long and happy life filled with a good husband, 4 children and lots of grandchildren and great grandchildren.

I will post more photos of mom and her sister later.

A Good Visit

We were having a good visit at SLC last week. Mom, who had been sick, was well and walking much better--steadier.

As we were sitting together on the sofa mom held her hands out in front of her and said,

"Aren't they pretty?"

I'm sure she did not mean to say that - she wanted to say something else but it did not come out right.

Dad looked at me as if to say,"Is she crazy?"

Then, as the loving husband that he still is, he said "yes" and gently caressed her cheek with his hand.

She had been fussing but took his hand in hers and once again they were a happy couple.

For the first time ever when I went to leave mom took my hand in a tight grasp and said,

" Stay here-don't leave!"

It was hard for me to go.

Veteran's Day 2010

It was our second Veteran Day celebration at Sutter Living Center. Ten veterans were honored with a full display of colors, uniformed VFW personnel and a 5 gun salute.

Song sheets were handed out to everyone but they were not needed as each man there sang from memory, "America the Beautiful" and "God Bless America".

Nine of the men were WWII vets, one man fought in the Korean War. All but dad were in wheelchairs. Two were amputees and 4 had oxygen tanks attached to their wheelchairs. At least 2 had Alzheimer's and some could barely lift their heads--but all smiled and raised their hands as their names were called out.

It was a good day for America.

It was a proud moment for them as they have so little left.

We had coffee and cake afterwards and talked and laughed and the men told some stories as best they could.

Dad helped clear the tables and watched over mom as a good and faithful husband should and then we all went home.

It was a good day.