Winter 2011

Well, it is winter in Michigan. Mom and Dad are warm

and cozy

at Sutter Living Center.

I thought I'd go over to Red Park today

and check up on our cottage, the Wigwam.

Dad is always so concerned that it is being

properly taken care of.

A bit of snow on the roof

on the deck



I don't think too much mail is being delivered.

Dad and mom met here in Michigan when they were just teenagers. This is the cottage were Dad and his brother spent summers with their grandmother. Their sister,MaryLou, was 8 years younger than dad, but I'm sure she became a big part of the summer fun.

No sitting and looking out at the lake for quite some time.

There are ice fishing shanties out on the lake now--if you look real hard you may be able to see some of them. We have never gone ice fishing but we have shoveled snow off of the lake here and done some ice skating!

January 26, 2011

We had a fun time of singing with these two men for over an hour. I noticed that a few of the women who never seem to talk or show facial expression were smiling and singing all of the songs. Mom, of course, sang along clapping and laughing.

Everyone loved the baby.

Mom has been happy-waving and blowing kisses. I hope this phase lasts for her.

Dad is more content. He told Doug the other day that he did not HAVE to stay at Sutter but that he had decided to stay in order to help mom.

Also, the staff have told me that he has indicated that he and mom have decided to stay.

He was looking at her with such love and compassion when we were there that I was proud he was my father.

He loves her.

Somehow he understands now that she is sick and that she needs him.

His love has endured dementia-hers and his.

God loves us.

He will never leave us nor forsake us.

His compassion fails not.
His mercy endureth forever.

It is the love we all need.

Jesus dying on the cross

put there by His great love for us.

It is winter in Michigan. My favorite time of year.

Who is that masked man?

Last night I received a call from the nurse at Sutter Living Center saying that dad had fallen.

How did he fall?

He was giving mom a goodnight kiss and tripped at her bedside.

Deb said he had hit his nose and had a cut on the right eyebrow and that he may get a "shiner".

Well, I was not expecting anything like this.

We still kept our appointment at the foot doctor's and dad was such a good sport that he still wanted to go to MacDonald's for a hamburger and milkshake.
We made quite the scene. Mom wouldn't take her hat off and then she started waving at the children sitting nearby. She motioned to them to come over and received a vigorous shake of the head as an answer. Well, can you blame them for not stopping by our table?
Then mom had to go "potty". She is afraid of the toilet these days, you know the HOLE and the water! Praise God we made it --got in and we got back out and then we were able to go home.
Dad still wanted to hold the doors for me and mom and he told me I looked pretty.
A true gentlman.
Hope you feel better soon, Dad.
And thanks for still wanting to give mom a kiss goodnight.
By the way, dad's black eyes really brought out the tenderness and concern in mom.
She was so sweet -"My husband has hurt himself".
She was once again his loving wife today.
As Pa Ingalls would say,"There is no loss without some gain, Caroline"

When I was a young man

This song reminds me of my father.

He does not have any short term memory and he does not understand where he is or why he is there but his dementia is not like mom's.

She is travelling deeper and deeper into the Alzheimer's Disease. One day she will have progressed in the disease to the place where she can no longer stay at Sutter Living Center but will have to go over to the regular nursing home area.

What will Dad do then? He will not understand.

I love him so much these days.

He always smiles and is so happy to see me when I visit and he takes my hand and we walk the hallways talking about Louisville and the old house on Primrose. "Have I picked up his mail there while he has been away."

He wonders if the cottage is all secure and his boats looked after.

How were his parents when I last saw them and his brother, Bob and sister, MaryLou.

His sentences are always perfect and his vocabulary usage undiminished.

But where are you, Dad? I miss you. I miss Mom. You don't call me anymore on the phone and at Christmas you are not there. You always loved Christmas. I remember you putting the bike together in the workroom of the basement in LaGrange that you had gotten for Bill one Christmas. You let me watch and we talked about how excited Bill would be.

You may even remember the year you got Nancy and me those wonderful electric typewriters!

You enjoyed Christmas this year. You had mom with you and you held her hand and told her how pretty she looked. She stuck out her tongue and waggled it at you while making a face.

What do you suppose she thinks about?

But she knows me and she seemed to recognize Alex and his family when they visited after Christmas. Alex said,"This is Stephen, do you remember him?"

Her wonderful answer was," Of course, I would never forget him." It was a miracle sentence.

Social situations bring out the best in her.

Love you Mom